Incitement to Riot…

Incitement to Riot.
What Trump Told Supporters Before Mob Stormed Capitol.

“When you catch somebody in a fraud, you are allowed to go by very different rules. So I hope Mike has the courage to do what he has to do, and I hope he doesn’t listen to the RINOs and the stupid people that he’s listening to.” – Donald J. Trump, Alleged President.

Whipping up anger against Republicans who were not going along with his plan for subverting the election, like Vice President Mike Pence, Trump told the crowd that “different rules” now applied. At the most obvious level, the president was arguing that what he wanted Pence to do — reject the state-certified Electoral College results — would be legitimate, but the notion of “very different rules” applying carried broader overtones of extraordinary permission as well.

“RINO” is a term of abuse used by highly partisan Republicans against more moderate colleagues they deem to be “Republicans in Name Only.” Trump insinuated that Republican officials, including Pence, would endanger themselves by accepting Biden’s win. “I hope Mike is going to do the right thing. I hope so. I hope so, because if Mike Pence does the right thing, we win the election. … And I actually — I just spoke to Mike. I said: ‘Mike, that doesn’t take courage. What takes courage is to do nothing. That takes courage.’” “I also want to thank our most courageous members of the U.S. Senate, Senator Ted Cruz, Senator Ron Johnson, Senator Josh Hawley. … Senators have stepped up. We want to thank them. I actually think, though, it takes, again, more courage not to step up, and I think a lot of those people are going to find that out. And you better start looking at your leadership, because your leadership has led you down the tubes.”

Trump twice told the crowd that Republicans who did not go along with his effort to overturn the election — Pence as well as senators like Mitch McConnell of Kentucky, the majority leader, who did not join in the performative objections led by Hawley and Cruz — were actually the ones being courageous. In context, the president’s implication is that they were putting themselves at risk because it would be safer to go along with what he wanted. During the ensuing riot, the mob chanted “Hang Mike Pence.” Trump suggested that he wanted his supporters to stop the certification of Biden’s electoral win, not just protest it. “We will never give up. We will never concede. It doesn’t happen. You don’t concede when there’s theft involved. Our country has had enough. We will not take it anymore, and that is what this is all about. And to use a favorite term that all of you people really came up with, we will stop the steal. … “You will have an illegitimate president. That is what you will have, and we can’t let that happen. These are the facts that you won’t hear from the fake news media. It’s all part of the suppression effort. They don’t want to talk about it. They don’t want to talk about it. … “We fight like hell, and if you don’t fight like hell, you’re not going to have a country anymore.”

Two months after he lost the election, Trump repeatedly told his followers that they could still stop Biden from becoming president if they “fight like hell,” a formulation that suggested they act and change things, not merely raise their voices. As he dispatched his supporters into what became deadly chaos, Trump falsely told them that he would come, too. Now it is up to Congress to confront this egregious assault on our democracy. And after this, we’re going to walk down, and I’ll be there with you. … We are going to the Capitol, and we are going to try and give — the Democrats are hopeless, they are never voting for anything, not even one vote, but we are going to try — give our Republicans, the weak ones, because the strong ones don’t need any of our help, we’re try — going to try and give them the kind of pride and boldness that they need to take back our country.”

As he sicced his supporters on Congress, Trump assured them that he would personally accompany them to the Capitol. In fact, as several of his followers and police officers were injured or dying in the ensuing chaos, the president watched the violence play out on television from the safety of the White House.

Four people died as a result of Trump’s blatant incitement, his betrayal of our Constitution, the nauseating attempted coup, which like all things Trump meddles in; failed. His infantile tantrum, both by words and actions and even inaction led to the deaths of four citizens, including a Capitol Police Officer. By whipping his cult of MAGA disciples into a frothy rage against a Democratic process that has been followed, whether we like the results or not, for centuries.

Donald Trump lost. He’s a loser. Now staring down the barrel of a second Impeachment, having lost both the 2016 and 2020 election’s popular vote and having used Russian interference and financial assistance and a barrage of deceptive, racist, xenophobic and bigoted propaganda to steal the 2016 election from Hillary Clinton and being totally and utterly decimated without it (maybe even with it) in 2020 by the voice of the American people, this sick, deranged and psychotic malignant narcissist, an individual with a 3rd grade vocabulary and 7 year old’s maturity has decided to wage war on anyone and anything he perceives to be his enemy.

But, he will fail and lose that war too and on January 21st, the war will come to him. In the form of myriad criminal and civil suits, from sexual assault and tax fraud and embezzlement to obstruction of justice and probably even misdemeanor drug charges. And, then there are the inevitable wrongful death suits thanks to his incompetent and sadistic handling of the COVID-19 Pandemic. His entire criminal enterprise that is the Trump family, who are tethered to him will ultimately sink to the bottom with him.

But Trump and his Jim Jones, Jonestown, cultists won’t go away overnight, despite his constant fleecing of their every nickel penny and dime. Are they too stupid to realize they’re being flat-out robbed or are they so indoctrinated that they truly are willing to empty their bank accounts, lose their jobs and homes for a man who would throw to any wolfpack, under any bus or in front of any bullet, all for the sake of preserving himself and most importantly, his brand?

The Vortex…

The Vortex…
March 1st, 2007

I’m not a person that has an easy time waking up. Nor am I someone that wakes up out of the blue…without provocation.

However, this morning was a different case. Shortly after 8 a.m. I was wide-awake as if someone had flipped a switch.

I knew today had the potential to be a very hellish day weather-wise but I had no idea just how bad it would be. I hobbled to the kitchen and poured my standard cup of black coffee and flipped on the television.

Today’s “Armageddon” was in full swing. Tornado warning number one had been issued. To the southeast of me, about ten miles, a tornado was spiraling in the clouds, attempting desperately to find its way to the Earth below.

To the southwest of me, fifty miles or so, tornado warning number two had been issued. Its path heading right for me. First things first. [I]Where[/I] is number one? Number one’s rotation was now just miles from my house. Time to take action…

Ok. Animals secured, spot in the closet prepared, panic starting to build…

Ten minutes go by and number one is still spinning in the clouds, yet to touch down. Number two is now 25 miles closer. To the northwest of me, tornado warning number three has now been issued and is tracking to the northeast.

My dogs have now begun to whine constantly and pant. From the sliding glass door I can see flocks of birds, Cowbirds, Sparrows, Doves, Crows, Vultures heading my way. The sky just a mere three miles away is pitch black and churning.

I’m spared from number one. However, number one went on to kill 15 people later in the day. Now, where is number two?

Number two is now just about 15 miles south of my house. Glued to the local news reports, I can see through my bedroom window the forest behind me beginning to whip back and forth. But as I’m preparing to hunker down in my corner of the closet, the meteorologist announces that this warning has been dropped. Within minutes, the rain had halted and the wind died down. Dodged another…

This afternoon, I had to pay a visit to my attorney. At the time, there were only two warnings, to the north and west of me. We set out in reasonably ok conditions but returning home was far less than “reasonably ok”. The wind had already picked up greatly in just two hours and as the highway took us past Mobile Bay, more warnings were announced. Number four was heading right for us…at 60mph.

Pedal to the metal and as the skies blackened, the rain came down in sheets, the warning expired, just as quickly as it had come up.

But not for long…

Fifteen minutes later, number five reared its ugly head. This one was a monster. Still racing at 60+mph. Dumping sheets of blinding and driving rain, whiting out everything, leaving you unable to see farther than 100ft. in any direction. The treetops whipped back and forth violently, cracking limbs to both sides of the highway. Gusts of wind blew what appeared to be hunks of trees and puddles of water across the road. The car shifting with each gust. Above us was a hostile and angry cell of rage and madness…tornado warning number five was growling and hungry.

Mile by mile we trudged, fearing that any second a funnel would appear to lift us up. Fearing that any second, debris might cripple the vehicle as tops of trees that had been blown down jutted out in to the lanes.

An experience I’ve only experienced once before while on the road. Taking place at night, the lightning storm was awe-inspiring but the enveloping darkness made it much worse than this. Two other times I have experienced such terrifying weather…

Hurricanes Ivan and Katrina.

As a lover of all things Nature, even though being caught underneath a raging sky scared me senseless, I still am brought to my knees by the raw passion of this planet.

Nothing is subtle…nothing is without reason…everything contains beauty. Despite the casualties…it just goes to show you, just how insignificant we are to Mother Earth…

We just do not matter to her…

Lust…

Lust
02/25/06

There’s still a hint, of your scent, down in
these sheets, I can’t bear to bring myself to wash,
away the stains, that you and I have ground and slaved.

With each drop of sweat, to make these sounds and
tastes, that haunt me every day, that you’re not
here, alone, without your skin, from head to toe

And I am a wreck…

This language of lust, your lips, against my neck
and your nails, dug in, scratching away the flesh, drawing
blood, which you cannot get enough, and your legs, wrapped
around my spine, never cease this release, and it’s just
too fucking far away!

And I am a mess…

Yes, Donald. You’re Very Special. But We Hate you. Now Go Away!

And President Trump had stern words for the mob: “We love you. You’re very special. Go home.”

But you must understand: They were upset. But upset about what??

How couldn’t they be? Trump’s long-ago boast that “when you’re a star, they let you do it” has dangled over everything that followed. His presidency has been a harrowing survey of the things that are possible if nobody stops you. The norms he eroded, from his unreleased tax returns to his insults to his firings by tweet, his phone calls, his impeachable offenses — it is amazing, after all, what you can do, if no one bothers to get in your way. And now, here was democracy, standing athwart the will of Trump and his people.

So when Trump urged these disciples to march on Congress, they did.

This story is not unrelated to the American dream: a story about who deserves things simply by virtue of who they are, and who doesn’t; who is instantly presumed to be a true countryman, who will be told to go back to a place they never came from. It is a story about who gets to go where, who gets to exist safely in public, and who is only there on sufferance. It is a story about who gets to be real.

It is not a surprise that Trump has thrilled white nationalists and white supremacists, Proud Boys and xenophobes and misogynists, those to whom being more real than others is so important. It is not a surprise that after Charlottesville, Trump was keen to see “very fine people” on both sides. He has always known whom he was addressing. “You’re strong, you’re smarter … you’re the real people,” he told his crowd Wednesday. “You’re the people that built this nation. You’re not the people that tore down this nation.”

He has been dividing the country into us and them for as long as he has been in public. For them, a full-page ad calling for the death penalty. For us — go ahead and grab them by the pussy. His pitch has always been that some things belong to you not because you have earned them but because you did not have to earn them. They are your birthright, and to be denied them is an affront: Supreme Court seats, the presumption of innocence, deference from police officers, the presidency itself.

“We’re gonna walk down, and I’ll be there with you, Trump told his rally-goers seriously but not literally; he boarded his motorcade and returned to the White House. Because you’ll never take back our country with weakness. You have to show strength and you have to be strong.”

And when you’re real, they let you do it. You can be a grown, bearded man, brandishing bear spray, and a place ordinarily bristling with metal detectors and guards simply opens to you. A senator raises his fist in support. “We’ve just got to let them do their thing now,” one officer told the New York Times.

But if you are not lucky enough to be the real one in the story, then what you see is different. The Trump era is also the story of being menaced with guns and told you weren’t actually being menaced with guns — you were seeing people exercising freedom; you were watching a cheery band of patriots come to see their government at work. They were domestic, in the most vibrant militia tradition of the Founding Fathers, nothing like terrorists. This was their right, if a little rowdy. Everyone calling it a coup, or a mob, or an insurrection was hysterical. Proud Boys will be little boys, after all.

It is the story of a president seeing all this and turning to the people who wreaked this havoc and telling them, “We love you. You’re very special.”

The message echoes down the frescoed corridors: Never forget, for a second, what we can do to you, if no one stops us. Well, the giant pumpkin and “The Base”, also translated literally in Arabic to…wait for it…”Al-Qaeda. But, America did stop him by loudly and vehemently giving him the literal and figurative finger on November 3rd and then again on January 5th when Democrats gave Republicans the boot from their throne in the Senate and we will keep doing it because America has what the Autocratic GOP doesn’t: integrity, honesty, compassion and one hell of a will to never give up…

Twitter Enables Violence and They Can Kiss…My…Ass.

I’ve all but bailed on Twitter. They’re complicit in hate speech & an enabler of seditious rhetoric. Not to mention hypocritical assholes. Everyone pretty much knows Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg is an emotionless sociopathic dildo but Twitter’s Jack Dorsey likes to keep his sociopathy and greed for the almighty dollar concealed in the shadows but make no mistake about it, he’s just as big of a dildo as Zuckerberg…

I’m off to Mastodon & my own website, where I can say innocuous drivel w/o Twitter suspending me for nothing or for who I follow and interact with. Twitter has now suspended me twice for using the following two terms: “Hoochie Hoodrat” and “White Trash”. They have yet to explain how either, which were not directed at anyone personally, violated their “Hateful Conduct” policy. Why haven’t they? Because neither are hateful conduct or speech. In fact, Twitter’s algorithm takes into account who you follow, who follows you and how you interact with them. Yes, if they say something hateful, YOU could be punished for that as well. Guilt By Association is a totally fucking bullshit policy that even most REAL Law Enforcement agencies don’t subscribe to. And CNN’s Kara Alaimo, who I love to pieces, agrees. This is a MUST READ!

Twitter can’t undo Trump’s damage now

Opinion by Kara Alaimo
Updated 9:55 PM ET, Wed January 6, 2021

(CNN) – On Wednesday, rioters stormed the US Capitol after they were encouraged by President Donald Trump to engage in “wild” protests while Congress counted the electoral votes certifying that Joe Biden won the presidency. Republican Rep. Adam Kinzinger called their actions, which included breaking windows, invading the House and Senate floors and other violent behavior, a “coup attempt.”

Besides President Trump himself, a portion of the responsibility for this attack on our democracy also rests on the shoulders of Jack Dorsey, Twitter’s chief executive, and to a lesser extent, on Facebook’s Mark Zuckerberg and other tech executives whose platforms have allowed Trump and his allies and supporters to spread malicious untruths about the 2020 election. With the horrifying images of a Capitol under siege still glowing on most of our screens and amid pressure from groups like the NAACP, Anti-Defamation League and Free Press, it comes as little surprise that on Wednesday, Twitter, Facebook and YouTube all took action on Trump’s posts. Facebook and YouTube both removed Trump’s video addressing supporters earlier Wednesday, in which he urged them to go home but reiterated his debunked claims about election fraud. Twitter initially restricted retweets and disabled likes and replies to the video, but later removed it along with several other tweets. Then for the first time, Twitter locked Trump’s account for 12 hours and said it might be banned altogether — which stopped short of a call from the NAACP president, issued through a spokesperson, to ban his account entirely.

All of these actions come too late. One reason that things got so out of hand in the first place is because Twitter didn’t shut Trump’s account down sooner. I warned even before Trump took office that the way he won the 2016 presidential election was largely by sharing information that was untrue on Twitter. The platform, of course, allowed Trump to bypass the traditional media, which would have fact checked him, and make claims that were patently false. Trump continued to do this throughout his presidency. And because no one was willing to shut him down (@jack, I’m looking at you), he only became more emboldened.

Social networks should have held Trump to the same standards as other users from the start. The first few times he shared mistruths or used abusive language, his posts should have been immediately removed and he should have been issued warnings. If he then continued to share misinformation or hate, his accounts should have been permanently suspended. If this had happened, our Capitol might never have come under siege.

But because he wasn’t held to account, Trump’s claims grew more dangerous over time. According to The Washington Post’s fact checkers, Trump initially made an average of 12 false claims per day, so it took him 827 days in office to reach 10,000 false claims. But it took him just 440 days more to reach 20,000 false claims — an average of 23 per day.

In addition to lying more as he realized he could get away with it, he also began to use more abusive language. As Helio Fred Garcia wrote in his 2020 book “Words on Fire: The Power of Incendiary Language and How to Confront It,” “over time, the frequency and intensity of Trump’s language (on social media as well as in speeches and with the media) changed. Without anyone or anything to stop it … he became more aggressive and his language more directly incendiary when discrediting his political rivals.” And, predictably, Garcia noted, after Trump insulted members of different groups, hate crimes against them spiked. So, let’s be clear: This is not the first time he has incited violence.

Of course, many of Trump’s tweets violated the rules Twitter applies to other users. But when Twitter was asked why it allowed Trump to tweet, for example, veiled death threats against North Korea’s leader and foreign minister in 2017, the platform said he enjoys an exemption for being “newsworthy.” As I argued back then, no one should be allowed to abuse Twitter’s platform, no matter how powerful they are.

Yet, because he enjoyed this impunity, Trump was able to build a base on Twitter that actually believes his mistruths. Now, the problem is that we have a huge number of citizens who falsely think the election was stolen and stormed the Capitol as a result.

In regard to the ongoing situation in Washington, DC, we are working proactively to protect the health of the public conversation occurring on the service and will take action on any content that violates the Twitter Rules,” Twitter said on Wednesday. If Wednesday’s events show us anything, it’s that this kind of approach is antiquated at best and dangerously naïve at worst. It’s too little, too late. While shuttering Trump’s Twitter account now would make it too late to alter today’s disturbing threat to democracy, we still need to prevent this from happening again anywhere. Being a world leader should not exempt anyone from being required to follow the community standards that apply to other Twitter users. No one should use the platform to spread hate and misinformation. Jack Dorsey should change this policy today.

Facebook, for its part, called the rioting a “disgrace,” but also declined on Tuesday to shutter Trump’s account. That’s also a mistake. In a televised address, President-elect Biden called on Trump to go on television and shut down the protesters — a sentiment that was echoed by many others on Twitter, including Alyssa Farah, his former communications director. The problem is that these calls, however well intentioned, reinvested Trump with too much power, signaling that a single statement from him could end the insurrection. Get our free weekly newsletter

It’s true that Trump probably did have the power to end this faster and more bloodlessly with a single tweet or address than was possible through any other channel. But our democracy can’t hinge on the claims of a single person who lies and incites violence. We have to be stronger than this. We need institutions that keep us safe and ensure a peaceful transfer of power — including the Congress, which clearly needs better security. And we need social networks that don’t spread hate and lies. While all eyes have been on Trump this afternoon, they should also turn to Jack Dorsey, who holds extraordinary power to help prevent future attacks on our democracy. In the long term, it’s social media platforms who have to make the next move.
https://www.cnn.com/2021/01/06/opinions/trump-twitter-failure-capitol-violence-alaimo/index.html

Fairy Tale…

Fairy Tale

Red Riding Hood, searches the forest,
knuckles of ashen gray.
Big Bad Wolf, lurks behind her,
plots out his destruction of prey.

Tin Man in a suit made of liars,
holds his head so low.
Scarecrow shit on by others, ablaze
his body burns aglow.

Two lovers embracing in darkness
while the moon, she shines.
Walking the boardwalk, hand in hand
each in love, they swear this time.

In love with a vision of beauty that
leaves me so believing in tomorrow
and I don’t wanna come down again from this
stalk and I climb and I climb and I climb
till I die and my hands, they will bleed
but I climb to my lover’s breath,
lay my head down on the breast…

Comfort/me/now!

Rapunzel, let your hair down!
I need your serenity now!

I’ve scared away phantoms that have
kept up with keeping the pace.
And I’ve dedicated my time and effort
and love to running this race.

No more stories about how I was
once alone.
This spirit, with her arms of strength and
love and compassion, of my beloved,
wrapped around this fucked up and wrinkled soul.

Keeps me alive!!
I’m living a fairy tale!

Keeps me alive!
Thought I was dead inside!

Clinging to her/every breath!

Reckless…

Reckless…
12/24/2007

I’ve been reckless with a heart I’ve
grown to love.
I’ve been careless with a kindred spirit
that I adore.

No sense in crying about what I have lost,
when I should be crying over bridges I may
never, ever cross.

No reason to lie to myself.
So afraid of what I will hear.
So scared of her words and I think
maybe I should just disappear.

I’ve been hiding these feelings for so long,
now I don’t know what to say.
I’ve been keeping my heart from her,
crying to the heavens, as I watch you
walk away.

How did I find a way to let such chance
become disarray?
I had it in my grasp, couldn’t find my strength,
while she gave up on me, this heart I neglected into
atrophy.

And each time I close my eyes, she is all I can see.
In my dreams, my thoughts, the blood,
she’s a part of me.

And I am lost, confused, so alone, everything’s
unclear without her here.

And I’ve been reckless with a heart that I love.

So I disappear…

The Temper Comet…

The Temper Comet
10.22.2019

Five trails, hydrogen, feel the panic,
hear the static, lost the gloves,
see the dismantle…

Seat belted, double knotted, close my eyes,
envision the landing, jolt of violent,
it starts to shatter.

Metal screeching, crepitating, feel like retching,
grip the handles, crack wide open, watch the
blood drip down!

Tailspin, fire in the engines, starts the tumble,
cartwheel fledge, think back years reminisce,
17, no control, suicidal, almost left the edge!

But promises, of better tomorrows, opened windows,
there was no sorrow, through the grater, tred the
razor, God never said he was my navigator!

Now 40, 64 missions flown, one difference, 17 was me
40 is who’s at home, wife and mother, two first-class
daughters, placing flowers upon my stones!

Fingers stuck together, smear the tear and blood,
before I can’t remember. Never mind the Taker,
Soon we’ll all be vapor, close my eyes and cry,
I’ts okay, it’s fine, I’m alright, ready to meet
my maker!

Impact, visor’s cracked, look for Cap, nothing left
but his digestive tract. Unbuckle, fall to dirt,
Pitch black with stars, hypnotic, as a matter of
fact.

“Could have been worse.” I say to myself.
As I sit down all alone.
Hours go by, just now gazing upward.
Had to prove it to myself.

And I’m the only one!
Just one out of the three!
Shouting “Why oh why?!
Why is it me??

And these stars seem to have, a comforting mind
of their own.
As they cloak and they swaddle me.
Impossible to fight about.

And slumber has come about…

…to be continued.

AphasiA©

This Just Can’t Be Good For You…

I honestly think my equilibrium is my own worst enemy sometimes. The more I try to center myself, the dizzier I become…

My last true romantic interest hasn’t spoken to me in almost a month and that tells me where that would have led me. She stopped talking to me because she believes I am still hung up on the romantic interest before her and that is partially true, partially.

I still have a few feelings for her, I won’t lie to myself but it is nothing deep like once before and besides, she’s taken and it does me absolutely no good to dwell on it, would never have worked.

I still hear from her every now and then and as much as I desperately want to say something, hell, anything at all to her, there is just something that will not allow me to, that just clinches off my ability to speak. That rolls up the newspaper and pops me on the head with it and says “NO!”.

Part of this is a conscious desire I am sure but I don’t know what the other part is at all. I think I am losing my sanity, not that I had any to begin with. I just like to tell myself that I am sane to keep from going insane from knowing I’m insane! There are only so many times one’s bridge can be set ablaze, I guess (shrugs)…

I don’t know why I can’t just cut the rope and watch her float away in the current, why I can’t seem to get beyond it or get her out of my head. Maybe it is because I am a perfectionist. Maybe I’m a glutton for punishment. Maybe I just like the abuse. Whatever the reason is, it has not yet become clear…

It’s hard for me to let go of positive emotions though, because I don’t experience them that often and maybe that is why. My last real true relationship ended years ago and very badly. She cheated on me and then when busted, lied to my face.

It damaged me. It burned out every bulb of trust I had. It shrunk me down to something microscopic and it shattered my confidence and my opinion of myself.

I don’t know what it is about me that keeps fucking it up. I mean, I know I’m not very attractive but I have an actual sense of humor and a personality to boot but I think I am my own enemy. I guess maybe I wanted to be something other than this brooding, sarcastic and unfeeling asshole…and I guess that just isn’t possible.

So, I do the same little dance I always seem to do. And round and round I go, 360°, until I’ve inevitably come full circle.

Bastardland…

First of all, a lot of people have the impression that I’m just a ranting, negative asshole and while I do rant and rave and I am a negative person sometime, I still have feelings. Hard to believe, I know but they exist behind this manure encrusted façade.

So, recently, when I had a now ex-friend hurt me, I did what I normally do with hurt feelings and negative energy. I wrote it out. And thanks to her, I’ve been writing…a lot. I believe that sometimes writing a letter to someone you have an issue with, whether they read it, understand it or not helps the person feeling that way tremendously.

Think of it as therapy…

I’ve been hurting people a lot lately also. I’m consciously aware of that. Whether it be with words or denials of attention and acknowledgement. But only the ones who have consistently hurt me. I’ve undergone this transformation, a sort of reverse catabolism if you will. I began to see things, faults, red flags etc. more acutely and was able, unlike years gone by, to act on them and make the needed changes.

I look back at the last four years as an “openly anguished period” in my life. A period where I was open emotionally and mentally, especially to other people. Unfortunately, this period clouded my judgment and vision and it allowed certain undesirables to infiltrate my daily life, ultimately hurting me.

I refer to these people as “parasitic humans” much akin to leeches, sucking the blood, the life and the spirit from me. I had to find a way to cut their hooks out of my skin. It was time for me to make a choice, to not take it anymore, to stop being used and abused. To get up and pick off the blood-suckers. One by one.

I’ve been disappointing people a lot lately because I’ve been hurting a lot lately. My decisions to remove people from my life, even if they are selfish parasites is something that I am struggling with greatly and I have grown a little despondent and maybe a little depressed by some of them. Kind of like an addiction and now I’ve gone cold turkey.

-But-

The choice to remove some of these people was necessary. Whether the “connection” was just gone or whether they did something to get on my bad side, it just needed to happen. Was a matter of pulling the trigger.

Looking back at a couple of these relationships, it is painfully obvious as to how fast they were in a tail spin, how rapidly they had become stale, stagnant and a one way street. It hurts when your feelings were more than just “pals”. With more than just one person. Especially when those feelings were never reciprocated by either of them and they were the basis of my initial reasoning.

There is only so much rejection and dejection a person can mentally handle before that person cracks and has to remove the person hurting them from their lives. My way is being a prick. It usually works. I don’t know. It was so much easier when I was closed off, unfeeling and cold-blooded and I desire very much so to return to my comfort level of being. I’m a lone wolf by Nature. I do have a wolfpack and they love, care and worry about me but I like to roam, be solitary.

But I’m still having a hard time with moving ahead, staying focused and not looking back or down. It used to be so easy for me. What happened? It was almost like the people that I knew and who knew me, that deserved it recognized this metamorphosis happening. They took a stand, told me they were on my side, with me all the way. They made a choice to stick with me, no matter what. No. They showed me they wanted it.

The other half…they either were oblivious or like a couple I’ve met…they blew it off, laughed at me, scoffed and dismissed me…and now…they’re on the outside looking in. Watch out for those “friends” that wield daggers; because you never know when one of them might wind up in your spine. This comes down to
human nature. My life’s motto when it comes to humans: “Trust no one. Believe nothing and question everything.”…

To the people that decided I was worth it?

I say thank you…