Jelly Doughnuts.

I’ve learned that trust is much like a flower. Wonderful to have growing in your window but so delicate that the slightest bit of damage could ultimately destroy it forever. Such a fragile ability we human beings have, this trust.

Intentions are another. We are the only species on this planet that has the ability to choose to lie and say what we do not mean. We are a deceitful breed of animal raised on white lies, back-stabbing, vindictive mentalities and blatant cheating.

Women lie about their age because they cannot face the fact that they are really aging. People lie about their weight. They lie about their appearance. Men lie to their wives, girlfriends and fiancés about affairs, cheating with strippers or hookers. Women lie to their husbands, boyfriends and fiancés about affairs with old flames, that co-worker or the pool boy.

Lies are weapons and the human race has become perfectly comfortable using them as such. Politicians lie to their constituents. The government lies to its country’s own citizens. Doctors lie to cover up their negligence. Lawyers lie about everything. People lie to cover up their tracks or their illegal activities and such a gross
lack of character is crippling us as a species.

Then, there are the people that say one thing and do another. They tell you that they care about you and that they value your opinions and friendship and that they could never fathom being hated loathed or disliked by you and then find new and clever ways of contradicting themselves by hurting you over and over and over.

Those are the lies that cut deeper than anything. Those are the lies that completely destroy friendships, how you view someone and how you feel.

The negative g-force from having to stop so quickly and shift directions on a person causes such a massive chaotic evolution within one’s own body and mind that it sometimes makes a person feel as if they aren’t even alive or existing in the same dimension as the rest of the world.

It turns your mind upside down to feel positively about someone and then negatively with the consistency of a churning ocean during a Hurricane. All the while they sit by and continue to cause people pain and admit that they do not care.

I like to consider myself a very honest, trustworthy and loyal person to the people I sincerely and truthfully care about and to the people that sincerely care about me in return. I hope dearly that I have their respect for that. However, my biggest and most damaging flaw is that I wind up trusting the wrong people and allowing
them to get too close and to take advantage of me. Someone disputed the fact that I have a “chink” in the armor but after self-examination…there is the “chink in the armor”…

We are a self-absorbed and self-centered creature hell-bent on doing only for ourselves with no regard to the people we may intentionally or unintentionally damage along the way.

However, being cognizant of the fact that you have hurt someone deeply and not giving a shit is inexcusable and shameful…

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