Counter.Social: The Nickelback of Social Media…

DEVIL: I’m not a fan, no. I was never impressed either. It’s similar to seeing this really expensive, tricked out hot rod and once you buy it and turn the key, nothing happens. So, you try the key again and still nothing happens. So, you swing the door open and pop the hood, only to find out everything under it is made of cardboard and held together with duct tape.

GHOST: That’s what the social media site is like. All filler, no killer. It has unlimited potential though and it really could be a rival to Twitter one day…

GHOST: Counter Social calls itself a “unique social network.” It claims to not have bots, trolls, abuse, fake news, and “foreign influence operations” on the platform. The platform is ad-free and doesn’t run promotional content. Counter Social says, “Our users data is not mined or sold for any purpose.”

DEVIL: Wait.
No bots?
No trolls?
No abuse?
No Fake News?
No Foreign Influence Operations?

DEVIL: Bull-fucking-shit…

GHOST: Counter Social may not have a bot problem, that might be true but there is definitely abuse and trolling, including from our esteemed fake Succaneer, The Jester.

DEVIL: Oh yeah! The Jester, God’s gift to the hobby of inconveniencing websites like fucking 4Chan. So, who is this is alleged crotch-suckler? I mean, swashbuckler?

Who owns Counter Social?
Counter Social is owned by The Jester, stylized as JΞSŦΞR ✪ ΔCŦUΔL³³°¹ (@th3j35t3r), who’s an anonymous hacktivist. The Jester calls himself an American patriot and lists July 4, which is Independence Day in the U.S., as his birth date on his Twitter bio. Time listed him among the top 30 most influential people on the internet in 2015. The list in 2015 included then U.S. President Barrack Obama and Kim Kardashian.

DEVIL: Okay! Now I’m literally dying of laughter! His claim to fame is hacking Amazon, PayPal, eBay and wait for it…fucking Mastercard.

GHOST: But, I mean, that’s gotta be a full-time job, sucking off all of these supposed writers to get a name that isn’t even yours into the social lexicon.

DEVIL: Lame.

GHOST: All of this nonsensical self-fellating bullshit comes with absolutely zero proof or evidence. Unlike in my previous two posts, after being falsely accused of lying and making shit up, I brought out the goddamned receipts.

DEVIL: You did. You more than proved that everything you showed and said not only happened but was true right down to even the most mundane cog or bolt.

GHOST: Just look at this fucking interface.

DEVIL: JFC that’s like TweetDeck and TweetDuck threw up all over a dark mode of Buffer.

DEVIL: The first two posts in this series clearly touched a nerve with Captain Snowflake and I don’t know how it got back to him but I’m now blocked on Twitter and I know you had fully deleted your account, which I admire by the way—

GHOST: What??

DEVIL: I’m a sap. Trying to save contacts and media and you just hit button, turn the key and nuke that shit.

GHOST: Yeah! I wake up to this in my email:

GHOST: Wow! Just, wow…

DEVIL: It really is pathetic and it made Jerkster a flaming hypocrite. It’s really just sad, lonely and bitterly juvenile.

GHOST: You know, I was looking at analytics and had every intention of completely trashing Counter Social’s stats against Twitter’s but Goddamn, man…those numbers are beyond laughable.

DEVIL: I think at this point, we’re just beating a dead horse.

GHOST: We may pick this back up again, that is if “The Jester’s” ego doesn’t suck him out into space like the old man’s house from Up.


GHOST: Later all you degenerates, perverts and freaks. You’re my kinda people and I love ya all.

OnyxGhost and SpeakOfTheDevil…out!

*Transcribed from Skype. Originally posted on Substack.

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